Hello, readers.

I am moving my fingers to conduct this blog post.

This post contains information about my newfound love for Sofia Tomlinson.

However...

It is not new.

You see, dear reader, I accidentally dumped Sofia. She then started dating Derek..

You may remember him from my blog post earlier today -- the man I plan to murder.

I might not be successful in this, but as former Apple CEO once said, "It's the thought that counts."

He died of cancer.

Isn't that nice? Well. Anyways -- that is off-topic.

YOU reading this are invited to my wedding.

Just shoot me a message! (Don't actually shoot me, that would hurt, a lot)

See you there (hopefully)!

Oh -- one more thing!

There's this ugly twat named Devin. He is extremely ugly. He's also very ugly. Did I say that already?

Well, I hate him. He has ruined my life.

Before.

He is a pussy. He keeps leaving the land of barbz.

What a loser.

Attention wh0re.

A no-good, dirty freak who deserves to rot in Hell..

Is that extreme to say?

No.

However.

You may think so.

That is fine by me.

It's just a stupid thought you have.

-

Sorry about that.

--

Toodles!

Hello, readers. Do you love me? I fear not.. but that is okay. If you appear ugly, you might not be. That isn't my motto -- but it's a good one to have nonetheless. I do stuff very well. Perfectly, to be honest. But most aren't that way.

I continued the MyDoom virus. Just kidding. However, I am extra secret. You don't know me. I don't, either. Welcome.

As I continue...

Boba. Soft, milky, bouncy, just like my tits. Sorry. How are you? ^ ^

I stared for a while. So contradicting, my page is. Not acceptable.

However. Don't stop. Believing. Glee. Ew. That program.

Mm, but you see I'm not British. Not that I know of at least. Suffering for a breath of air is not a joke But you just - I know. Hush, like a puupppyy. Stretching words is cute. You know what else is cute?

You wonder for a split second and say Tell me!

I agree..... but for it isn not if we are as strained to a Book as we are to pixel--- tomorrow. And again. Issues arise, but that is not the point. Or is it? A

Answer back, love you

Hi, readers. This blog will be addressing the queen, the multitude, the highness, that is SZA.

Wikipedia: Solána Imani Rowe, known professionally as SZA, is an American singer and songwriter. In October 2012, SZA self-released her debut EP, See.SZA.Run, which she then followed up with her second EP, S, in April 2013.

Jess (Me): SZA is amazing. Every song she releases contains 0 flaws. If you are an anti-SZA, I will leak your address to 89,793+ people. That wouldn't be fun, right? Right.

Hi, MySpace fans. So.... you may be wondering, who is Sofia? Who is Derek? Well.... one thing at a time.
You see, Derek(o), AKA he/him lesbian, is a vile piece of shjt. Anyone who sees him will realize that instantly. He hasn't showered in fifteen days, his hands smell like salami, and he is fatter than Lizzo.
The issue with him, past his obesity, is his relationship. You see, he is in a relationship with Sofia. This poses an issue as Sofia should be marrying me.
My plan: Kill Derek. It shouldn't be hard. He's much too fat to run far anyways.

and rude. u are a whore who cant keep a woman OR a man bc ur dumb and weird. loser.

edit: SOFIA I MISS YOU IM SORRY OK PLEASE TAKE ME BACK I THOUGHT U WOULD LOVE ME AGAIN