bruh i keep on forgetting i have myspace ahahaha anyways stream mitski!!

i've returned

lol

hey uhh today is my birthday

hey everyone it´s me aylock. i wanted to tell you guys about how my life's been going. it's honestly been a pain and i've been struggling with my mental health and self-esteem. surprisingly enough, i don't feel like taking a break from social media. maybe it's cause this is my only escape, or cause i have online friends that need me, but i don't wanna be subconciously disappointed at. speaking of escapes, i've been escaping from my family situation through three things, Lukas, classical music, and reading fanfiction. you are probably wondering who lukas is.

lukas is an oc i've made who i "talk to" through an old notebook and my phone. whenever i feel like ranting, or telling random tidbits of information to, i just pull out a pen and write. this calms me because my writing is illegible, and i can literally show you this. i'll show you all in a different post, so you'll see how crazy my writing is. lukas is the dick-bestowed version of me. he's essentially a copy of me, but he does weed and is 5'9". we share music tastes, and in my mind, we cry together. i've never told anyone in my life i do this, and i am kinda scared that this is more proof i'm mentally ill. as scared as i may be, i know i'm weird in the brain, and the proof would realistically calm me down about this.

another escape for me is listening to classical music. look, i'm even listening to it right now as we speak. i'm listening to Piano Concerto No.2 Shostakovich right now. it's calming, like talking to lukas. i usually listen when i'm feeling negative emotions, and it helps immensely. listening to classical music is so much fun. listening to opera is even better. i usually save opera for nights when i have to release my bottled up emotions, which are now fridays at midnight. i cry until my eyes get sore, and chug a couple gallons of water to gain back the water i lost. online school, abusive family, and the lack of breaks from life definitely make a perfect combo for bottled up emotions to generate.

anyways i gotta go change up my playlist, see ya later!!

hello this is my review of 2020. overall it was a piece of shit to live through, and i learned so many unfortunate things about myself. i made new friends though which was good but i also got very traumatized. i hate this year so much that not even i would wish the pain of this year on my worst enemy. 0/10 would never recommend i hate this so much goodbye

AYO MY BOOTS CAME IN!!! MY WONDERFUL BOOTS FOR MY FRAGILE FEET!! IMA TAKE PICTURES LATER SO YOU ALL CAN SEE :)

MY FUCKING CHRISTMAS GIFTS ARE COMING IN ON SUNDAY!!! FUCKIN SUNDAY!!!!!!!! MY NES BOOTLEG IS COMING IN FUCKING MID JANUARY!!! I FUKCING THSJFEHIIU FUCK RT_ G D THFOS FUCK THIS LIFE FUCK AMAZON FUCK CAPITALISM FUCK TIME FUCK REALITY FUCK EVERYTHING JSDHFKJHDJKFHJDKHFJDHJF

dear people of the internet,
it is i, aloc!! i've returned from reality to inform you on the latest. first of all, happy holidays, i hope you celebrate some good holidays and stay at home safe away from others because of COVID, unless you're in a country that has handled the coronavirus pretty epicly, like New Zealand, or Australia. i envy said countries because the UNINED STATES IS SO PATHETIC IN HOW IT'S HANDLING THIS SHIT OH MY GO-

nonetheless, happy early christmas and ooh we're approaching the first topic of this month's blog, gifts!! my family's doing this secret santa thing and we all made a wishlist with things we want. you see, i'm not good with picking just one thing. i couldn't pick between a quill pen, new art supplies, this NES knockoff with 600 something games, and a ukulele. i went with the NES knockoff thanks to the ✨ google number spinner ✨ and now i have to order something for my slightly emotionally abusive mother... i think i'll order her some oven gloves or something.

ooh i forgot about ideas i've been thinking about!! so currently my friends and i made this minecraft SMP called the Femago SMP, after my friend's online pseudonym. so many things have happened and i wanna have y'all know!! it's a crazy story!! i've also gotten ideas for songs and books and things, as well as my own self image. turns out inferiority complexes are VERY real.

anyways i've been getting less bored now than before and more stressed cause of school, but hey, winter break's on monday!! i want to die like please send help this is pain to deal with AAAAAAA-

forget about that last sentence

anyways uhh i gotta order christmas things uhhh have a nice day or night and remember, it's not illegal if the authorities don't find out!!!

dear people of the internet,
it is i, aloc!! i've been working on a new project of mines for a few days now, and i wanted to let you all know!! it's a comic series that i wanna make a bunch of stuff for, and hopefully release it on webtoon and other places!!! for now i've titled it "gyro's usb" and it's a story about Marshall Sotry, commonly known as M.S, a teen who must retrieve a shady USB drive for the guy he likes in onder to win his attention. he encounters a bunch of obstacles and gains a few new friends on the way. i hope you people of the internet follow my journey on developing this story!!! have a nice day or night and remember, it's not illegal if the authorities don't find out!!!