mary's little lamb

All those weeks i avoided you
i did it in disgust for myself
and i believed that you were a good person that cared about me like a little sibling
but what did you gain?
from all of this. why just now do you tell me?
i never wanted to hear it
and what was i there for?
so that you could use me for whatever perverted thing you've done?
i was a little lamb and you were a wolf who climbed up from behind.
i have no way of defending myself now. i am ridden with bugs that are filled to my core and you-
i could never blame you for anything of this. even though you did it to me.
everything i own is still marked with your signature.
my skills,
any ounce of happiness i might have,
even the keyboard i am using right now.
I wish i could hate you
but I still want to be your friend.