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".~..RaWr..~."
Female
13 years old
United States
Last Login: 1582788533000
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1582789127000

Dear Diary

Mood: Apathetic

My life is spiraling downward
I couldn'’t get enough money to go to the "Blood Red Romance" and "Suffocate Me Dry" concert
It sucks cause they play some of my favorite songs
Like “Stab my heart because I love you”
And “Rip apart my soul”
And of course “Stabby rip stab stab”

And it doesn'’t help
That I couldn'’t get my hair to do that flippy thing either
Like that guy from that band can do
Some days
You know...

I'’m an emo kid
Non-conforming as can be
You'’d be non-conforming too if you look just like me
I have paint on my nails and makeup on my face
I’'m almost emo enough to start shaving my legs
Cause I feel real deep when dressing in drag

I call it freedom of expression
Most just call me a fag
Our dudes look like chicks and chicks look like dykes
Cause emo is one step below transvestite

Stop my breathing and slit my throat
I must be emo
I don’t jump around when I go to shows
I must be emo

I’'m dark and sensitive with low self-esteem
The way I dress makes everyday feel like Halloween
I have no real problems
But I like to make believe
I stole my sister's mascara
Now I'’m grounded for a week

Sulking and writing poetry are my hobbies
I can’t get through a Hawthorne Heights album without sobbing
Girls keep breaking up with me
It's never any fun
They say they already have a pussy
They don'’t need another one

Stop my breathing and slit my throat
I must be emo
I don’t jump around when I go to shows
I must be emo

Dye in my hair and polish on my toes
I must be emo
I play guitar and write suicide notes
I must be emo

My life is just a black abyss..
Ya know
It'’s so dark

And it’'s suffocating me
Grabbing a hold of me
And tightening its grip
Tighter than a pair of my little sister's jeans
Which look great on me by the way
When I get depressed
I cut my wrist in every direction
Hearing songs about getting dumped gives me an erection

I write in a live journal
And wear thick rimmed glasses
I tell my friends I bleed black
And cry during classes

I'’m just a bad, cheap imitation of goth
You can read me “Catcher in the Rye”
And watch me jack off
I wear skin tight clothes while hating my life
If I said that I like girls
I’'d only be half right

I look like I'’m dead and dress like a homo
I must be emo
Screw Xbox
I play old school Nintendo
I must be emo

I like to whine and hate my parentals
I must be emo
Me and my friends all look like clones
I must be emo

My parents don'’t get me ya know
They think I'’m gay just because they saw me kiss a guy…
Well, a couple guys
But still, I mean it’'s the 2000'’s
Can’'t two… or four dudes make out with each other without being gay?
I mean, chicks dig that kinda thing anyways

I don’t know, diary
Sometimes I think you are the only one that gets me…
You’'re my best friend
I feel like tacos

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