V E N T - trans struggles

sorry, I gotta rant.

I'm a trans guy and I recently changed schools (partly) because I wanted a fresh start. So nobody at my school has EVER known me as anything other than Kaspian and he/they. But in my grade, there are now some of "the boys" who are talking bad about me behind my back (my friends have told me this). And on one of the websites that (parents and teachers) have access to, it says my legal name, and since I don't want my classmates to know about it, my mother emailed the admissions to get it changed, they have now added my legal name to a (different) website that ALL OF MY CLASSMATES have access to, which means that ALL OF THEM can see my dead name and to be completely honest, I'm so fucking done.
I can deal with people calling me ugly or whatever the fuck they wanna say, but I am not okay enough to deal with them calling me my dead name, calling me she/her (especially on purpose), or calling me slurs.
And I don't want to hear "well it's hard to get used to a name and pronouns" because I have NEVER during the time that they've known me, gone by my dead name or she/her pronouns. Not to mention that when my mom hear me rant about this, she said that "well no wonder, you don't even look male" and I-. NO! YOU CAN'T FUCKING SAY THAT. I TRY MY BEST BUT I CAN'T EXACTLY CUT MY TIDDIES OFF BEFORE I'M 18 MOM. I CAN'T GET ON TESTOSTERONE. YOU AND DAD AREN'T EVEN LETTING ME CHANGE MY NAME (legally) YET, YOU WANT ME TO WAIT FOUR YEARS.
FOUR YEARS.
F O U R YEARS.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk, sorry abt that haha. This is great cuz I can't write this much on any other social media XD.

EDIT: I've gotten in contact with the school nurse to hopefully be diagnosed with gender dysphoria to speed up the process a little bit :D